Today was my first day of teaching, which is an interesting thing when you're untrained and undirected, but I think it went alright. It's a bit of an odd situation. I'm essentially taking over one of the Korean English teachers' classes for a day (there are four Korean English teachers); they stay in the classroom, translate when necessary, and try to keep order. I stand there and speak very loudly in English. The problem is that the level of English is extremely low; I had not expected this. They're high school students, they've been studying the language since Kindergarten. My first impression is that I'm trying to teach conversation to linguistic toddlers. The kids themselves seem sweet enough, if pretty rowdy. One class, after perceiving my frustration, came to my cubicle with a Korean gatorade-type drink and apologized. What do you say to that? Anyways, I think it'll be alright; I only see each class once a week, so I can use one lesson plan for the entire week. That is pretty bad ass for a lazy bastard like myself. The Korean teachers have to work ridiculous hours, do all kinds of planning, and teach in the shitty old classrooms, whereas I dick off, leave before them, and teach in the "English Cafe" which is state of the art, computer, projector, sound system - as nice as the classrooms at App. Makes me feel a little guilty. Also I get free bad ass Korean food lunch, all the super sweet instant coffee and green tea I can drink, and today they kept giving me all kinds of snacks and drinks. Soon I'll be offered daughters and new cars.

But it's not all fun and games. Still no hot water. I am bathing, don't worry, but Christ it's unpleasant. I actually found instructions for the thing online, and still couldn't get it to work. I think it's broken. It must be. I can't be that stupid. Overall I would say that the Korean household is overly-weighted down with buttons - the hot water thing (which also controls the infloor heating system), a million different light switches for one tiny-ass apartment, and a toilet seat from the future with all kinds of buttons and obscure pictures next to them. Playing with them my first day (when I thought you had to use them to flush the toilet; there's a regular old flusher for that) ended in a pleasant surprise a few hours later when I sat down on a preheated seat. I once heard that a warm tush improves digestion. Of course I heard that from a homeless man in Detroit.

So I'm settling in. Tomorrow begins my first weekend. Where are all those expatriates (expats is one of those words that right now annoys the shit out of me but will eventually begin using) I've heard all about? Who'm I gonna get all ugly American drunk with? I'll root 'em out, if by God I have to Talnado the whole town. I'll tell you all about it, just like you give a shit. I hope I can get a shower before then; I'd hate to get fired for poor personal hygiene.